there's never enough

There are moments in time when the world stops. When the music comes to a pause so abrupt, it's almost as if you were waiting for it. If the wind was blowing--it would be silent. If it was snowing--snowflakes would be made of glass, and sharp. I am in one of these moments.
How I got here is neither here nor there. But I've been here for awhile. The past six months has been the most eye-widening experience of my life. In some light it could be thought of as positive, in my mind I call it a forced transition.
I've constantly questioned my faith in myself. Most of my relationships have become weathered or broken, on either end.
Sometimes I find myself so frustrated, confused and on the edge of tears--screaming tirelessly with no echo to even prove that I've heard myself.
Mother robin is pushing her baby bird out of the nest, hitting every branch on the way down.
I'm finding these realizations hard yes. But at the same time and on some level, I'm thankful for them.
I'm thankful that I'm challenging myself. I'm thankful I'm finally trying to harness the unbridled selfishness I have and cast it out. I'm thankful I'm growing up.